#but is that stupid bc i currently only have like one job in mind to apply for and i don’t even know if they��re hiring yet

[steviescrystals]

one more rant about my layoff in the tags and then i’ll shut up i promise

[fairycrackhead]

𝒃𝒂𝒅 𝒓𝒐𝒎𝒂𝒏𝒄𝒆 | toxic fuck boy Gojo x toxic reader

pairing: toxic fuck boy.ᐟGojo x toxic.ᐟreader

summary: Halloween night is now engraved in your memory which you can only assume it will be for the rest of your lives. When you two should have been trick or treating as normal 14 year olds would do, you instead opt to take each others virginity’s. Now you two are stuck in an endless cycle of toxic bad romance.

warnings: mention of abuse, drunk people, porn, minors watching porn, minors having sexual Intercourse, slight degradation, having unprotected sex, mentions of pregnancy, hair pulling, mentions of murder, toxic relationship.

word count: 3.5k

a/n: this was a random idea i thought up of when i heard the song ‘bad romance’ by lady gaga on the bus the other day! anyways this is my first fic i hope you sluts enjoy :)

⎜ 11:32 pm My Bitch (y/n) : your seriously a dick yk that?

⎜ 11:37 pm My bitch (y/n): i fuckin despise u

⎜ 11:45 pm Mr. Cock (Gojo): and your telling me again, y?

⎜ 11:47 pm My bitch (y/n): bc your w/ another girl like it’s clockwork, do you not see the problem here, Gojo? i asked you to stop the bullshit.

⎜ 11:49 pm Mr. Cock (Gojo): ur not my gf. im in for pussy that’s it. yk im not a relationship guy

⎜ 11:52 pm Mr. Cock (Gojo): and yet you continue to come back to me. pathetic honestly

⎜ 11:56 pm My bitch (y/n): fuck you

⎜ 12:00 am Mr. Cock (Gojo): already needy? 😂

You should’ve known what kind of man Satoru Gojo was when you lost your virginity to him on Halloween night, 2011. It’s not like it was forced upon you, besides the occasional talk in the middle school hallway that ‘girls who were virgins were prudes’ or ‘how pathetic is it that there’s still virgins in the 8th grade’. Looking back at it now, it sounds really stupid…like really fucking stupid. All those supposed ‘women’ they would call themselves, ‘women’ who just now learned how to correctly put a tampon into the pussy that they just mercilessly shaved, (more like butchered), were all still scrawny, pathetic little girls inside. Of course hearing all the chatter about everyone’s virginity losses, the stories that were so horrific it made you wanna vomit and change schools, made you insecure on the inside. It’s not like you hadn’t thought of sex before, it just wasn’t your current desire to have some undeveloped boy’s dick in one of those…holes down there. Which also brought up another concern for you: how to even do the act. You assumed that the other person would lead (which was a bad guess because Gojo was a fumbling inexperienced idiot as well).

And it was almost nothing like the old pornos your dad had playing on repeat on the old box tv. He’d spend all his off days (which were more than days he actually got his ass up and went to work), drinking, belching, an occasional scratch of his ass, and watching naked women dance around on the grainy tv. You guys never got the money to buy a new one, maybe if he went to his job down the street at the local corner store he could afford more than the crappy ten dollar pizza down the block.

But who knows, you’ve seen those disgusting scenes, at an age way too young to even comprehend, so did you really have any knowledge? You were a curious kid, not a dumb one, you could easily depict whether or not the porn on the screen was realistic or not. Most the time it was the latter. The overdramatized moans and screams made you wince, on more than a few occasions, but it’s not like the paper thin walls separating the living room and yours did much to help. From having no mother figure to really correct your behavior, and a father that couldn’t give a fuck less, it started your one of many issues. Discovering sex at a really young age, not the act itself but any form of porn an eight year old could get their sticky, grubby hands on. The noises from the tv haunted your mind in a chilling way, making you want to stay as far away from it as possible, yet were still so fucking intrigued.

Until it was the start of the 9th grade, and surprisingly the comments the ‘women’ made in the locker rooms were still present in your mind, not surrounding your every thought, but still there deep down in the back of your mind. ��Girls who are virgins are lame prudes’. If only you knew that those girls were bluffing about the whole virginity loss thing, but it seemed convincing enough at the time. The way they described how their ‘mans’ bent them over countless times over their granite countertops, or on the elementary school playground. It sounds absurd now, but they had big boobs, and horny teenage boys liked big boobs, so it must of been true, right?

And now here you are, at an headache inducing party, or rave, whatever you wanna call it, watching Gojo talk to yet another girl, more like plain on flirting. She seemed like one of those girls that wouldn’t know if a forty pound dumbbell hit her right in the forehead, so just Gojo’s usual fuck of the night. All he did was stare at her boobs which were spilling out the corset of her trashy costume, and make very poor conversation. What a man whore. You could see Gojo’s shit eating smirk on his lips even from far away and in the almost completely pitch black room, only flashing lights that could cause seizures giving you any sort of seeing ability.

His eyes move from her lips to her tits. Lips—tits—lips—tits. You just wanted to knock the red solo cup out of his overly large fingers and put them somewhere useful. (Such as your aching cunt just dripping in anticipation.) You wanted to go to the nearest open bedroom, drag him by is weirdly hot silver chain, and let him have at you. But you hold back your desires, trying not to let into another spiral of emotions with this man, the same cycle that’s been happening forever now.

You practically crush your phone with your bare hand after receiving that last text, but you refrain and shove it back into your bra since your day to day purse didn’t match your outfit. You take a long deep breath, one you often had to take due to Gojo’s infuriating cocky persona. Walking over to the kitchen, a mini bar was set up in this random kids house, which wasn’t even his you assumed by the family pictures propped up on basically every flat surface.

You hated the parties your friends dragged you to, you felt too old to be in the scene of just barely legal adults blacking out and throwing up so much to the point of you having to look around before walking to avoid stepping in someone’s chunky puke. But to your surprise you actually enjoyed the noise, not making it, but watching others create it. It gave you some sort of distraction from your thoughts which seemed to consume and take over your life since the 9th grade. You wouldn’t call it trauma necessarily, it’s not like you knew you had a fucked up home life until you were fresh out of high school. People on the outside saw your drunken father, crappy rundown home, and the rotational three outfits you wore each week to school and saw it has straight abuse. On some level, the lack of care you were given could be seen as abuse by default, but you were a happy kid. Sure, you were exposed to porn by the time you were eight, but it was just normal to you…in some kinda depressing fashion.

Gojo came from a completely different background, whenever you stepped into his gated community it felt like you were in some other world, an insanely futuristic environment. He was rich, but he wasn’t cocky like those spoiled brats you see on those UK television shows like Super Nanny. At least not when you two had met. It wasn’t a close friendship necessarily, but you two enjoyed each other’s company’s to the point of having sex with each other, so maybe you were closer than you originally thought.

⎜12:08 am Mr. Cock (Gojo): don’t forget you made me like this. don’t get pissy abt what u created.

You dig your phone back out of your lace bra and scoff when you see the message, your hand threatening to go find this piece of shit and chuck your phone at his big head instead. You don’t answer, stuffing your phone back where it came from. You gently push other drunks out your way, reaching for a beer from the ice chest. Using your mouth (one Gojo would call very useful and efficacious), popping it open with your canines.

One thing you loathed about Gojo (not to mention the other 52 things written in your notes) was he thought you were the reason for his ‘fuck boy’ qualities. Yes, you both took each other’s virginity’s, it’s not like he didn’t want it, in fact he wanted it more than you, judging the throbbing of his cock when he first showed it to you. It always comes flooding into your mind every night, more so each Halloween. You came to resent the holiday since it only reminded you of that night 13 years ago. Despite it being over a decade ago, you still recall the nervousness and excitement that you felt when he finally came inside you. It makes you laugh when you remember how totally freaked you were, how you thought you’d get pregnant with his baby.

At that moment you repeated over and over again how ‘this was a terrible idea’ and ‘i hate that you let us do this’. It was an all around shit show for a good twenty minutes before Gojo finally snapped and yelled at you to get over it. Besides it not being the most calm way to handle your panic, it worked. Who could blame him, he was scared shitless too. You both ended the night by trick or treating, it was a kinda dud of a night considering typical trick or treating hours ended two hours ago during your private fun. Luckily Gojo spotted a house on your near midnight walk, a load of halloween candy left in a bowl on some old lady’s porch.

“We shouldn’t-“ but of course, he didn’t let you finish, pressing a shy brief kiss on your lips instead. He had a subtle blush on his pale cheeks, a blush you would only see now during your angry make up sex sessions. Grabbing your hand, and practically dragging you to the house. “Just grab the fuckin’ candy, ya scaredy cat.” He laughs, looking around the dark streets before snagging the candy bowl with a big orange pumpkin face plastered on the front, running off.

“Gojo! YOU FUCKIN’ THEIF!” you giggle, suddenly the porch lights flicker on like some horror movie, and your heart drops into your ass. The door swung open to have your neighbor, Mrs. Miller standing there seething, her mini chihuahua perched in her arms like it was her newborn child. Gojo stopped in his tracks, still heavily breathing like some out of shape forty year old.

“Why you little!” Mrs. Miller reached out to grab you, only for you to duck her failed attempt of dragging you back. Gojo jumped up and down with an amused smile on his face, calling out for you to run faster, which you try to comply as best as possible. You run over to Gojo as fast as your legs would carry you, locking arms and running to who knows where, you can’t quite remember each detail. After that point the rest of the night was a blur to you, still thirteen years later. The sound of Mrs. Miller’s feisty chihuahua, later identified as ‘FeFee’ chasing after you being the most exciting part of the whole ordeal. Gojo and you laughing your way home, still heaving from running so fast from the tiny animal, a ‘disgrace’ to the dog community as he called it.

You both promised that after the scare of possibly having to raise a baby at the ripe age of 14, (and almost having bloody ankles due to FeFee) that fucking each other would be a one time thing.

But it wasn’t.

“F-fuck..! mhmph—God!” He continuously rammed into you from the back, his hands gripping your waist so hard it felt like you had broken bones. Your halloween costume was now thrown somewhere in the corner of this bedroom, who’s bedroom? You had no idea, but at the moment you couldn’t give two shits.

“Yeah? You like that baby?” Gojo thrusted harder, making a broken cry fall from your lips like water. “Knew you c-couldnt…resist my cock any longer, bitch.” Possessed grunts come from him at each thrust and movement he makes. Vibrations from the music of the party travel through the walls, Gojo going deeper and faster to the sound of the horrible rave music downstairs.

If it wasn’t a party, people might of thought a murder was going on by the sounds of your wails of pleasure, but it was normal to fuck at a party, no matter the location.

Tears seep into the pillow that the side of your face was squished down onto, mascara running down your face as you sob from a mixture of pain and pleasure. “Gojo!” you sob, the pleasure becoming too much to bare, yet you couldn’t get the established safe word (which you two only made in 10th grade because you overstimulated him by riding his cock to the point of him passing out) to come out. His dick was that fucking good.

The sound of his heavy, cum filled balls coming in contact with your plush ass make you clench around his length, causing an animalistic moan from Gojo. A room echoing SMACK comes in contact with your ass, making you thrust your back into him, fucking him right back. The burning of the stinging sensation leaves you wanting more, the feeling of his hand still lingering on your left cheek.

Gojo begins going at an alarmingly hasty pace, his whole body aching for more of you, all of you, every single cell. The sound of your sloppy pussy squelching each time he pulls in and out, makes the heat in the pit of his stomach rise. By now you can’t see clearly, eyes welled up with tears and the remains of gooey eyelash glue. One of his hands leave your sore hip, grasping into your messy locks, giving it a good tug “MHMP! ….F-f—fuck!” This only causes him to yank your whole head back, you look up through your lashes, which are stuck together with a mixture of glue and sweat.

“Y-yeah,” he huffs, gripping your roots to a point of it being just downright painful. “keep looking at me….yeah mhmph—j-just like that.” The intense eye contact makes his thrusts even quicker and more efficient, his fat, squishy balls hitting your puffy clit over and over. “So fuckin’ tight for me.” Another hard spank wipes itself across both of your cheeks, the jiggle of them causing yet another guttural moan from Gojo’s throat.

Your soppy wet cunt drips all down his cock, his balls picking up the reminisce of your warm, flowing juices. Gojo’s fingers unravel themselves from your now frizzy hair, the thought of having to wash it later tonight makes you internally groan. His fingers make a slow, tantalizing path up and down your back, the contrast evident between his soft, gentle touch and his monstrous rock hard cock going in and out of your folds. Your face plants back down in the tear-drenched pillow case, the bed creaking from the force of your two bodies going at it.

His slow paced, soft finger touches come to an abrupt end when it meets your soft breasts. An aching cry sounding from your lips as his pointer and thumb mesh together around your now hard nipple. “Mhm…look at you…all whiny for m-me.“ He thrusts harder, your cervix feeling almost numb and incredibly bruised. At this point, your slobbering at the mouth like a dog with rabies, eyes rolling to the back of your brain each time his cock hits every delicious spot.

Gojo’s movements start to get sloppy, as well does the kisses he starts to place on your neck, back, and shoulders. The quick erratic pace starts to slow, forearms trembling from the strength he’s used to hold them on the side of your head all night. His thrusts are slow, long, almost like he’s grinding in slow motion, yet it’s not any less effective. Your thighs begin to shake with overwhelming pleasure, the pressure your body is holding in making you wanna scream it all out. “Mhmph g-gonna cum!” You practically scream a moan out, making Gojo’s lips turn upwards in a smug grin. His lips make their way from the left side of your neck to the middle, and then to the right, leaving a trail of hot, open-mouthed kisses in their wake. Dark red and purple bruised hickeys are now spread all down your body, surely to be left there for weeks to come.

“Nuh uh…not yet,” Gojo grunts as he feels your warm cunt clench around his throbbing cock for the millionth time that night. “This is my pussy…I g-get to tell you when to cum.” You almost wanna roll your eyes at his statement but your too drunk off his cock to care. You attempt to protest, the knot in your stomach becoming too hot to handle, but you get shut up right away when his fingers twist around your sensitive nipple once more, letting out a deep moan from your soul. Your hands grip the silk sheets in desperation, needing to grab something in order to keep you stable. “Mhm, tell me baby…who’s pussy is this?”

You cry into the pillow, pain, pleasure, and the feeling of being absolutely turned on in your whines. After not answering right away, Gojo grabs you by the hair again, yanking your head back, causing your neck to stretch to lengths you didn’t even know you had the flexibility to do so. “I asked, who does…this pussy belong to?” He says through gritted teeth. You feel every 8 inches of his cock in your stretched out pussy, every inch filling you up to as much as you could take. Each vein, the pounding pulse that acts as a second heartbeat, every thick, gurthy inch. When you don’t respond for the second time, too delirious to even understand what’s going on, he throws your head roughly back into the pillow, picking up his pace again.

Everything able to clench on your body does, gripping the pillow with such force that your knuckles turn white. Drops of sweat patter onto your back from Gojo’s forehead, the warm salty liquid making you squirm. Another sudden spank lands on your fat ass cheeks, and you couldn’t help but let loose. “FUCK—GOJO!” Strings of loud breaking moans and screams escape your mouth, sounding like a real murder now.

Gojo throws his head back once he feels your warm, sticky cum surround his palpitating cock. He pumps his dick back into you, pushing your cum back into your dripping wet cunt as far as his cock would let it. He himself finally let’s go, the thin string in his body snaps as his warm liquids mix with yours, in all too familiar feeling. His deep moans rush right to your core, the thrusts becoming inconsistent and sloppy once more. You hear the big analog clock from the entry way downstairs, giving you a slight reminder where the hell you were. Some random persons house, where his parents would probably be any second, and maybe you were even fucking in their bed. You bite your lip, slightly turned on by the fact of possibly getting caught, like you were a teenager back home, sucking Gojo’s cock before his father returned from work.

You whisper moan Gojo’s name over and over like a mantra, in other words, thanking him for finally giving you what your aching pussy had needed. You can tell he’s grateful too, being more gentle as if he had not just fucked your lights out. Caressing your back, like he did the first time this toxic relationship began back in 9th grade. Any memory loss from him talking to that girl just an hour ago was completely thrown out the window, even though you knew deep down you were just like her. One of his play things, the only difference was you weren’t oblivious to his motives. In fact you played into them, driving the toxicity just as much as he did. It made it fun that way. No matter how many guys you fucked, the number of cocks you sucked, the lips you kissed, none of them compared to his, and it made you feel sick in the most pleasurable way possible.

Gojo eventually pulls out, after speaking strange sweet nothings into your ear, which you haven’t heard since he was fifteen. You hated how it made your heart feel so warm, unlike the feeling of the cool air hitting your cunt. The cold air makes you wince, missing his cock already despite still feeling it’s outline in your folds. Fingers leave your hard, tender nipples, bringing them down to your dripping cunt, wiping the access off your thighs.

You start to come back to reality from the moment, the room still filled with humid sticky air caused by the amount of hot breaths and touches made throughout. The only sounds now being your heavy breathing, reminding you of the night you two ran away from FeFee, and slurping from Gojo, licking away at his fingers coated with your sweet salty release. Your folds still leaking with a mixture of your cum, trickling down your painfully sore thighs.

Gojo looks at the syrupy goodness leaking onto the silk sheets, a liquid you would only expect to see on waffles at the local cafe down the street. He finally collapses on top of you, softly massaging your right side, face pressed into the crook of your sweating neck. Placing gentle kisses on your sticky skin, bodies molded into one by your muggy bodies. You savor the moment, knowing deep down in your heart that things would go back to how they were in just a couple hours, fighting, screwing other girls and guys, and all together, a toxic romance.

You sit on the curb, voices from the party still able to be heard as you wait for your cab. You sit there like you’ve been through hell and back, you were if it meant having the best sex you’ve had in a good long while. Sitting on one cheek, the other still too sore to have pressure applied to it, you hear a ding from your phone. You wait a minute, trying to calm your pounding headache from both the alcohol and the amazing sex you just endured. The cool fall air blowing past you as you open the text you received, a small smirk tugged up your chapped lips.

⎜1:34 am Mr. Cock (Gojo): had fun. see u next halloween baby 🫴🏻🍑

[yanderefarm]

yandere angel who’s sooo sweet and devoted ? like a cupid or something

yandere angel

cw;; blood, violence, yandere tendencies, abusive relationships, religion, corruption

you: sweet and devoted!!

me: he's so devoted to you he wants to make you bleed. got it.

no but really i hope his weird sweetness comes across. i was having a hard time writing this one. i knew i wanted to do something with the idea of a cupid becoming literally sick with love and the idea of a human just inherently corrupting an angel. i almost wrote y/n as a lot more of a bastard while the angel was just broken by mistreatment but i decided against that bc it might make some people uncomfortable.

ultimately i decided that he's a bit of a bastard and y/n is jaded. i like writing different types of sickness for different yanderes. i think a yandere who wants to monopolize you so badly that he'd be excited if he was the only thing you ever looked at with anger or fear is fun. he wants to take care of you and make you happy of course! he loves you so much. but if you're going to be bad and make him hurt you then he'll enjoy watching you in pain. i also like to imagine sometimes y/n gets back at him by hurting him too. he wouldn't mind if you were sadistic as long as you only showed him that side of yourself.

i don't really have any plans to elaborate on him more than this unless people end up liking him and wanting more of him.

he starts off as a good normal angel, he's a cupid it's his job to help people find love. after a night with you he becomes corrupted and bound to you. he lives with you, cooks your meals, makes your bed, just generally takes care of you. but he's sick. if too many people love you he'll have to kill them so it's best for you if you don't spend time with anyone but him. you're so afraid of what he'll do you can only go to work and home.

there's a story in myth that speaks of what happens when you lust after angels, an unforgivable sin to lust after and corrupt that which represents god. the punishment for humans is their undoing, a mythical unraveling at the seems until there is nothing of you left. but what of the angel? some say that corrupted angels have their wings ripped from their back and they're thrown down into hell. 

you wish that was the case. 

the angel that follows behind you is not currently spending eternity in a pit of fire and you are not currently being ripped apart cosmically. in fact it wouldn't be odd to assume that you two had suffered no punishment for defiling god's holiest creation. you couldn't be entirely sure that the angel had actually been punished but you certainly had been. you can feel deep inside of you something happened to your soul that night, something was taken away from you. according to the angel his punishment was his obsession with you but you couldn't necessarily see how it was a punishment when he seemed so happy. honestly you didn't even trust him that he wasn't always this obsessed creep. 

what kind of normal angel thinks that it's a good idea to flirt with a human at a bar to "get your self esteem up"? either he was just that stupid or he'd always been this broken. even if he was just that stupid he had to know what would happen to him if he went back to your house with you. you hadn't known shit. you thought that you were just getting a casual hook up after your last relationship ended in you feeling undesirable and unlovable. you weren't trying to lust after any angel! and now you were stuck with him forever. 

you think you might hate him. no one else can see him because he's in his angelic form and all day he's either pushing your friends away from you or he's overwhelming you with all his "love". you watch as he's putting sewing needles in your coworkers lunch. he claims that this coworker has feelings for you. you both know that the only one eating the needles will be you. maybe that's why he puts more in there. you think he might hate you too. 

in a few hours you're standing outside your office building coughing up blood and little pieces of metal. "could.... you ......sto-stop?" 

his hand gently rubs your back as you cough. "I'll stop when he's dead." 

"im no-not... gh-gonna let you... bastard..." your body is trembling. 

"mm~ then i guess I won't stop." he's getting some sick enjoyment out of this you're sure. 

you can feel your vision getting darker and your head falls against him. you feel his arms craddle you so tenderly and you honestly miss coughing up needles. 

it's always like that. neither of you die no matter what either of you do. you're trapped together until the end of time. maybe this is what they meant by unraveling you, your mind will wither away until there's nothing left of you. sometimes you let yourself believe he means it when he says he loves you. sometimes you think you might love him too. 

[huuuuughes]

Mine. - Jeremy Swayman

Summary: Jeremy comes over to beg for your forgiveness, and things quickly take a turn... but not for the worst.

Word count: 3.3k (its short ik im sorry)

WARNINGS: Daddy kink, dirty talk, unprotected sex, bad writing??? idk this is porn OKAY READ AT YOUR OWN RISK. pls dont read if you're under 18 thank u!!

Note: i wrote this awhile ago for goalie week and then a bunch of stuff happened and i kept forgetting to post it bc i started my first full time job a month ago and its kicking my BUTT. anyways thanks for reading :)

You could hear your phone going off from across the room. It was Friday night and the end of a very long work week. Your boss was driving you up the wall and your personal life didn’t seem to be going much better. Your friends were good, you just didn’t get to see them as often as you wanted due to just being adults and everyone having their own full time jobs. 

The one person who was supposed to make your life easier, better even, was the one currently blowing up your phone. You knew exactly who it was, but he deserved to sit there and stew for a while. But as you looked around your apartment while trying to decide what show to numb your mind with, you noticed things of his strewn everywhere. You didn’t live together, not yet anyway, but based on the amount of things you had at each others’ places, you may as well have. 

Your work involved working with many different clients, and making their dreams come true. You were a travel agent, and your boss didn't exactly adhere to the typical 9-5 schedule like a normal job. If you were awake, she expected you to be able to take care of the problem. 

You had already decided long ago that men didn’t always think with their brains. Jeremy was jealous, but of what you had no idea. Did you have a lot of clients who were men who wanted to surprise the lady in their lives? Yes. Did those scumbags also try and make a move on you sometimes? Also yes. But you were a professional, and always conducted yourself as such. As much as you wanted to, it wasn’t your job to fix someone else’s insecurities. You could tell Jeremy that he didn’t need to be jealous until you were blue in the face, but you didn’t know when he was going to get it. You weren’t broken up, but you’d told him you needed a minute for him to calm down. It had been a few days at that point, and you couldn’t deny you were also getting antsy. He may be a stupid guy sometimes, but he was yours.

After what had to be the millionth time of your phone going off with a DING of a text, you made yourself get up off the couch. The last message you had read:

Sway❤️: I know I’m stupid. I need you to know I’m sorry. Can I see you, please? 

After the stressful week you’d had, you wanted nothing more than to feel his familiar warmth around you. The moment he was near you it was like the noise around you calmed down to its lowest level. 

Y/N: I’m at home, you know where to find me. 

Sway❤️: I’m on my way, be there in 20. I love you. 

The next twenty minutes were going to kill you. Your apartment was already cleaned, because you liked to clean when you got anxious as mess only made you more anxious. Your doorman would recognize Jeremy and send him up when he arrived, so you didn’t need to even get up to let him in. He had his key, he knew exactly where to find you. 

After an eternity, at least what felt like one, you heard the familiar sound of a key in the lock. He quietly took off his shoes by the door, and locked it behind him. 

“Babe?” He called out, already walking toward the living room where you sat. 

“I’m in here!” You called back. Relief washed over you when you saw him, but you didn’t get up and go to him. He had to earn you back the way you deserved. 

“Where should I start?” He asked, sitting down in a chair only a few feet away from you. 

“How about how you shouldn’t act jealous of my stupid clients? Or any man that I’m ever with that isn’t you? Do you really think I’m that crappy of a person that I would EVER cheat on you?”

“I know I shouldn’t, I’m sorry. I know you wouldn’t do that because you’re the best person I’ve ever known, but-“

“BUT WHAT JEREMY?” You screamed, and you know it came out louder and meaner than you wanted it to. He recoiled a little bit but didn’t lose his energy. 

“I’m stupid. I’m a stupid guy, who knows you are way out of my league. It sounds like a dumb excuse, but I’m so scared of losing you. I want you, I want to love you, I want to be with you for the rest of my life. But you’ve seen the league, you’ve seen what this life can do to relationships and what it turns people into. I don’t want anything bad to happen to us. I know this isn’t the life you signed on for. I think about you being at home alone and I hate it.” He looked defeated and like he meant every word he’d said. 

“You can’t lose something you already have.” You wanted to close the space between you so badly. 

“You still want to be with me?” You got up and walked to the kitchen as he asked, putting away the wine you’d gotten out so it wouldn’t spoil. He followed closely, less than a few steps away. One giant step and he’d be able to close that space. 

“I wouldn’t have told you to come if I didn’t. You just needed to listen, and you weren’t hearing me. You don’t have to be jealous of anyone, that isn’t who I am.”

“I hear you loud and clear now. And I’m not jealous, you’re just mine.” The tone in his voice shifted to another one you recognized. 

“I’m yours huh?” You said it like you were challenging him because it sounded like he thought he already won. He should be fighting for you and showing you what that means. 

“Do you need a reminder?” He closed the space, so his forehead rested against yours. You could feel his hot breath on your face, breathing in time with you. Without warning, you pressed your lips against his with a new hunger behind you. You’d missed this heat between you, the raw need to have each other right in that moment. 

His hands explored your body, finding their way to your ass and lifting you up onto the counter. It was cold against your legs, the shorts you had on weren’t very long and you felt every inch of cold countertop but you didn’t care. His lips left yours with a moan and began making their way down your neck. You could feel how wet you were already getting, responding to his touch so quickly. You reached for the hem of his shirt and motioned for him to take it off. He complied in earnest, his mouth immediately returning to you.

Lifting your shirt up and over your head, your breasts became exposed for him to devour. He licked around your nipple, biting it and chasing you to arch off the counter while letting out a scream. Your nails were digging into every spot on him that he could reach. Momentarily he kissed your mouth again, bringing his still covered cock against your center. You could feel it hard against you, the friction only giving you the slightest relief. 

“Please daddy, please I need-“ You tried not to beg but the torture was killing you. 

“Tell me you’re mine and I’ll give you exactly what you want. Tell daddy who you belong to princess.” He whispered in your ear, continuing to kiss around your neck in the spot he knew you liked. 

“YOURS. I’M YOURS!” You needed relief or you were going to go insane. 

“Now was that so hard baby?” He asked. You didn’t even have the time or energy to reply as he pulled off your shorts in one big motion. 

“No underwear? Even better.” You attempted to push his head toward your swollen clit, but he wouldn’t go faster than he wanted to. He kissed and bit your thighs, leaving marks where he knew no one could see. You’d have those marks there for weeks. Each kiss he got closer until you finally felt his tongue brush against your clit. You shivered as he began to devour you, your thighs clenching around his head not wanting him to escape.

He pulled back but only for a moment, instructing you to lick the fingers he was putting in front of your face. You did as he asked, and he resumed going after your pussy. In a new move, he inserted his fingers into you as he continued eating. His tongue was licking in time with his fingers as they pumped in and out of you. He was hitting a spot in you that you didn’t even know was there.

“Holy shit don’t stop, don’t stop PLEASE.” You were writhing on top of the counter as he struggled to hold you in place. He knew you were so close to your high, edging you just along that fine line. You’re burning up and he knows it. His other hand reaches up and pinches your nipple before grabbing onto your breasts like they were his lifeline. 

You cursed him silently for having hair you couldn’t grab onto, but you pressed his head as if it could go further into you. His tongue quickened its pace, matching his fingers. You could feel your orgasm building and it was right there, all you needed to do was let go. 

“Let go baby girl, cum on my face for me..” He whispered against your clit,  and what came out of yours was a series of expletives that you didn’t care to understand. He could taste everything you were giving him, not stopping as you started to come down. Every nerve ending was on overdrive and he held you down against the counter. The wave of your orgasm rolled over you, your heart pounding in your chest. He didn’t let a single drop of you miss his mouth, and you saw his smile looking up at you as you tried to catch your breath. 

He stood up without breaking eye contact, and undid his own pants. He made sure all remaining clothes of yours were off, nibbling on your ears and down your neck as he did so. In a move of complete trust, he picked you up off of the counter and carried you down to where he knew your room was. His lips found yours again and suddenly your lungs were struggling for air but you didn’t care. Your arms were hooked around his neck as he walked, kissing him like your life depended on it. 

Setting you down on the bed, he laid you down on your back, and stood back to marvel at the sight of you. 

“You look… “ his brain was struggling to find the right word, “fucking stunning.” 

“And you have too many clothes on… sir.” You put yourself up on your elbows, looking down at his boxers that for some reason, had remained on. You didn’t need to let him finish what he was going to say, you needed him to do something more than speak. 

“Sir?” He raised an eyebrow and stepped closer to you. 

“Did you like that?”  You knew he did but it was your way of teasing. His mouth was on yours before you could process his next movements, placing one hand to your side to balance himself and the other knotted in your hair, pulling your head back so you were looking up at him when he pulled apart. You didn’t even realize that his boxers were already off, as you felt his cock brush against your leg and pussy. 

His hand left your hair and explored your leg, getting closer to its destination. His face was so close you could feel his hot breath on your face and his fingers glided over your folds, but so lightly it sent a shiver up your spine. You could hardly catch your breath but you were dying for him to touch you, to fuck you until you couldn’t remember your own name. You wanted him to hear you. His hand remained on your pussy, his fingers becoming soaked.

“So fucking wet for me baby.. did you miss me?” He quickened his fingers and began pumping them inside you. The feeling of his fingers wasn’t enough, you needed more and a whine-like moan escaped you. You whispered a response to him, and it spurred him on. 

“Please Jeremy please, please I need you inside me..” 

“That’s not my fucking name, not in here. In here I own you, isn't that right princess? Do you want me to be gentle?” You nod no, but that isn’t enough for him.

“Use your words princess.”

“No.”

“No, what?”

“Don’t be gentle!” You tried pushing his head towards your core again, but he remained looking at you with his fingers teasing you. He added another, stretching you from the inside. You gasped and scratched your nails up his back. 

You gasp again, as you feel him part you with two fingers and put his tongue against you again. He wasn’t done tasting you yet.

“Please baby, I need your cock. Please!” Your mouth couldn’t move fast enough and you didn’t even care that he had reduced you to a begging mess beneath him. Your hips wanted to grind, needing more friction. You could feel your release building again as he sucks on your clit. It was right there, you could feel it as you clawed at your sheets trying to grab onto something but there was nothing. 

Your legs spasmed around his head as your release flooded over you and he ate you once again. 

“So fucking wet for me, you’re so stunning baby girl.” He kissed his way up your body and aligned himself with your entrance. He isn’t gentle as he slams into you as he kisses your mouth like you’re the only thing keeping him alive. 

You’re left begging for air as his head drops down, ducking your nipple into his mouth. 

“Oh god, oh fuck..” you cry out as he wasn’t holding back. He slammed into you over and over, bringing his hand up to find your clit. As he fucked you he was playing with your clit again, causing your wetness to pool onto the bed. Every single nerve you had was on fire, and only he could put it out. 

“Tell me you need it, tell me how bad you want you want my cum.” The hand not on your clit slowly moves up your body to the bottom of your throat and locking his hand around it. Not putting too much pressure, but enough to lightly choke you. Both of your hands gripped his arm as  you felt his cock filling you and his thighs slapping against yours. His speed was increasing and so was the hunger in his eyes. 

“Oh fuck, fuck daddy please I need your cum I need you so bad..!” 

“You are mine, your orgasms are mine, everything about you is mine.” Without warning he withdrew from you, earning a desperate moan. Quickly he flipped you over into your stomach, pulling your hips back so you were on your hands and knees facing away from him with your ass in the air waving him in like an invitation. 

“You are the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen.” He whispers into your ear from behind you. He places kisses on the spot in your neck he knows drives you crazy, running his cock along your folds at the same time. He pushes into you again and holds back nothing. Jeremy grips both of your hips with his hands and brings your hips back to meet each one of his thrusts. The sound of his thighs hitting your ass echoes throughout the room, reaching spots inside you that you didn’t know he could. 

You couldn’t hold yourself up anymore, you collapsed into the bed as he fucked into you. 

“So fucking tight princess, this pussy was made for me.” His nails scratch down your back eliciting a loud string of moans. His thrusts become more erratic and he brings his hand up, then down to smack your ass as hard as he could. The scream you made encouraged him more, and you could feel a third orgasm building.

“Fuck daddy, please I’m right there I need to cum daddy please..” You didn’t know how he had gotten that many out of you, but you could already tell he was determined for more. 

“That’s it baby, cum for me, cum all over my cock..” He brought his hand around as he leaned into you to tease your clit some more. You were right there, you pushed back to meet his thrusts to get yourself over the hill and the relief washed over you. You moaned out his name, begging for him to fuck you harder and faster. 

He loved seeing his length go in and out of you, taking all of him so well. Spreading your legs to give him a better angle, his cock continued hitting that spot inside you. He slaps your ass again, and again. You cry out, knowing his release was close behind. His hands wrap in your hair and pull you back, making you arch towards him. 

“Fuck yes baby, you like it when I fuck you like this? You ready for my cum?” He chases his release just as badly as you want it from him, feeling him trying to reach his high. You nodded in response to him, not being able to form any more words. The only sounds coming from you were moans of encouragement, it felt like you could be on cloud nine. 

“FUCK!” He screamed as he pulled almost all the way out, slamming back in and releasing his load into you. Jeremy almost collapsed onto you, but he brought you into his arms as he pulled out of you as his cum slowly leaked back out. You knew he thought it was the hottest thing ever. Both trying to catch your breath and come back down to earth, he pulled you in once you laid down so that you were on his chest. You could hear his heartbeat going a million miles a minute inside his chest, but it brought you a sense of calm. Your person was back where he belonged, he had finally heard you. 

“I love you.” He finally spoke but he still sounded out of breath.

“I love you too.”

“No, you don’t understand. I love you, I really love you. THIS is what I want. This body, your perfect fucking curves. Every minute of every hour of every day, I want you. Not just your body, I want all of you. I’m sorry I was so stupid. I can’t promise you that I won’t make stupid choices sometimes, but I can promise to be better for you every day.”

“Jer-“ You attempted to stop him, you knew he was it too. 

“Please let me finish. I want to make you feel good, I want to be the person you want to come home to every day, I want to be the person who pushes you to be the best version of yourself and make you feel like the queen of the world. You’re it for me, there is no one else. I’ve spent my whole life doubting myself and chasing this dream I couldn’t even describe. But I can see it so clearly now, and I know that dream is you. And I want to be able to have forever with you, if you’ll have me.” You took a moment to absorb his words. 

“You have to make me a promise okay?” His eyes gleamed at you, like you were holding up the moon just for him. 

“Anything, you name it.”

“Promise me forever. There is no past anymore, there is only us and the future we make together. I want us to help each other be better. Okay?”

“Okay. How about we start forever now?”

“I thought you’d never ask.”

[junipers-archive]

Hi !!! I love your fics so much! They make me physically feel things and that’s the best feeling 🥹 if you do requests could you write something with Spencer where his gf is still at uni and just really overwhelmed with studying or writing stuff because she procrastinates do badly and she like blames herself but he makes it all better and looks after her ?🥹

Thank you sm!! honestly I needed this bc I've been over-working myself too :')

You were tired, no, beyond tried you were drained, worn out and fatigued. But to be fair, it was your own fault, you were the one who had insisted on persuing a phd, but unlike Spencer it was your first one. And you didn't think it'd be this hard.

But thats beside the fact, as of current you were on your way to meet said boyfriend for lunch.

When you finally get to the agreed resturaunt you can barley hold yourself up, it'd been a tough night you'd had three exams upcoming and you'd unwisely decided to pull an all-nighter.

When you see him a wave of relief follows as you basically flop against him. And maybe its the way you start to shake or the silent sighs you let out while clinging to him but you don't realize he's led you back to your car until you look up.

"Where are your keys?" he's looking down at you with a concerned expression and you can't hold back your tears now.

"W-what are you doing?"

He tilts his head like you've said the most absurd thing in the world, finding the keys in your purse and opening the car.

Once you're both inside he finally answers, "We are going home."

You feel terrible, all he wanted to do was eat lunch, he took time out of his busy schedule and now he has to take care of you?

"You-You don't have to Spence, I-I'm sorry, I just, I had a hard time studying because my professor she wanted an essay by the end of the week and I procrastinated and it's all my fault i'm so stupid-"

He silences you as he puts his hand over yours, reaching over as he drives you both home, squeezing it comfortingly.

"I know. I know Y/n, I was a phd student too and I know. And you're not stupid, you're just tired. It's okay to be tired."

Those words alone make your heart clench.

When you get home to your shared apartment he carries you bridal style despite your attempts to disuade him.

He lays you down on your couch, placing the fluffiest blanket you own on top. Kissing your forehead as he relieves you of his warm arms.

"I'll be right back." You're about to argue for him to go back to work but he pecks your lips, letting them linger sweetly before you can.

He returns with his hands filled with your favorite tea, two facemasks, an entire cookie can, a menu and more.

About to question him he answers like he can read your mind,

"For take out! Remember that Chinese place we were looking at?"

He sits down on the other side of the comfy sage couch, lifting your feet to rest on his lap and replacing your thin no-show socks with fuzzy penguin ones, turning on the tv he hands you the remote.

The tea is placed beside you on the coffee table, the cookie can sits between you and once he orders from the menu he helps you apply the face masks.

Funnily enough he grabbed the only ones you had that were animal themed, and when you're both 'exfoliating' and relaxing he looks like panda and you a duckling.

You watch 'Star Wars: Return Of The Jedi' and he answers the door when the takeout gets there.

As you're eating Kung-pow chicken, snuggled against him, now changed into your comfiest pjs you realize you'd forgotten to say thank you. But nothing seems like a big enough thanks for what he's done, so you reach over to squeeze his hand, and he gets it instantly.

"There's no need, its my job to take care of you. I love you. You're my person." And he's smiling and he's perfect and you think then that you could sit here in this moment for the rest of your life.

[lycankeyy]

Okay here's the whole thing I filled out with boyf in-character enjoy his one total braincell if he's lucky. I'm putting zero effort into formatting this bc tumblr is glitchy on my phone blank template is here

(cw: sexual humor. also a bunch of intentional typos and gratuitous swearing)

-

1. Okay, first question: what’s your name, age, and gender?

- they call me boyfriend im 19 and i sap the gender out of the music

2. How would you describe yourself, personality-wise?

- fuckkk man idk. im p chill i think ig im pretty cool. pretty swag pretty gamer

3. What’s a typical day like for you?

- welll I wake up at like. 11 usually at earliest and I hang out w one of my partners sometimes I watch movies w em or work on music. not a lot going on usually

4. How do you wind down at the end of the day? Do you even wind down?

- most of the time i literally just wait until i crash out sometimes gf and peeks gotta drag me to bed lol

5. What is your earliest memory?

- UHHHHH oh god uhhh. I think. When I was like five we went to a festival or smth and we went on one of those twirly things and I made my dad spin the thing so hard I threw up LMAO

6. What is/was your relationship with your parents?

- i mean p good i think but we dont rly tlak anymore thats mostly my fault tho

7. What do you do when you’re bored?

- succumb to the madness mostly

8. Do you regret anything you’ve done?

- i mean not like currently

9. Do you dress to be functional or fashionable?

- bro i wear the same exact fucking outfit every day to be honest with you lol. It's not like I'm fuckin going anywhere

10. Who are your best friends? How did you meet them?

- DUUUDE assuming my partners don't count gotta shout out my man darnell we've been workin on a collab ep recently it goes hard as fuckkkkk. we met back in the stupid therapy program back in middle school he introduced me to pico n nene

11. Have any siblings? If so, what is your relationship?

- yea got a big sister and a lil bro. they're both sweet but kinda clueless tbh. technically got other stuff goin on too but im kinda worried that ill get like the government on my ass if i talk abt it

12. What is your job? Is it tiring or difficult?

- closest thinf ive got to a job is music ig and nah. really wouldn't rather be doing anything else even if it payed more tbh. when I get burnt out I wanna die but thafs not a big deal lmao

13. When you’re going through a rough time, do you seek help or consolation from others?

- on a scale of liek paper cut to nearly died how rough are we talking

14. How easy is it for others to gain your trust?

- ive been told im pretty trusting but i feel like any person whos meant to hurt me was pretty upfront abt it so ┐(´∀｀)┌

15. What is your sexuality, if you don’t mind me asking?

- all the time all the time

16. Do you have a significant other? What are they like?

- "a" singular. lol. lmao even. bros asking if I got one singular partner lmao try two bitch and thyere the best most important people in the world

17. Have you ever lost a loved one?

- not like perminently

18. How often do you act on impulse? Does it ever backfire?

- lsiten if i do it all the time then like statisicly it only backfires like 40% of the time okay

19. Do you believe in ghosts?

- I believe in everyone bro

20. How about aliens?

- aliens are hisyorically very mean to me but ig i can just then believe that they can be better people. or aliens

21. What traits do you value the most in others?

- uhhh probably like being just nice ig? idk i think it can take a lot more effort than people think to be considerate and stuff I appreciate when people are nice even if they have a reason not to be

22. Do you dream often? What are your dreams like?

- i used to not to but somethings happened and now I get them all the time. don't really want to talk about it they're mostly just weird

23. Are you a light or heavy sleeper? Do you sleep in?

- my partners say im such a heavy sleeper that one time i slept through gf falling off the bed in the middle of the night but I was asleep so I can't cofnirm

24. Okay, this is a bit personal, but… Have you ever (uh) “done the do”?

- dude like u wouldn't believe

25. Do you have any pets?

- nah but I think it would be cool to have a guinea pig they seem chill and I appreciate their vibes

26. Ever been drunk before? How often do you drink?

- i try not to toooooooo much but i think i have a hard time telling when too much is too much. dont tell my parents

27. Are you respectful to authority figures?

- they only have as much authority as you give them. manipulate a landlord today

28. What kinds of movies do you like you watch?

- https://youtu.be/HgjyQ0_coJo?si=L5Bzhey5cxaoNpWU

29. Do you have any guilty pleasures?

- ██████ █████ █ ███████ ████ ███ ████ ███████ ███ ████ ████████████ ██ ███ ███ ████ ██ one time nene found it in my dresser and I almost DIED wait was this question not about sex stuff

30. What would you say is the happiest memory of your life?

- ohh thats hard uhh. happiest is hard to qualify i think. I think I'm happiest whenever I think abt waking up next to my partners

31. How about your worst memory?

- thats a good question

32. What did you aspire to be when you were young? Did that dream change as you grew up?

- i didn't think I'd be fuckign anythang

33. How far would you be willing to go to get what you want?

- u gotta quantify what I want here tbh. is it like a chocolate bar or one billion dollars. cuz id kill someone for a billion dollars. honestly i might also kill someone for a chocolate bar but like not as badly

34. What is sure to ruin your day?

- idk nearly dying again probably

35. Do you have any nervous habits?

- uhhh sometimes i mess with my hair and when i get rly upset i pull at it til it hurts. i used to scratch my face a lot when i was upset too but it freaks ppl out so i try not to if i can help it

36. Play video games often?

- i tryyyyy but i get distracted so fast i play a game and im like oh shit this reminds me of another thing i was gonna play n then i go play that and then I never FINISH ANYTHIGN

37. What kind of things do you laugh at?

- https://youtu.be/47EOSLWu-EI?si=kuzPv2Vndl91Oj3C

38. Favorite genre of music?

- BROOOO ok gonna be basic as shit and say breakcore. also a huge fan of speedcore and drill & bass but breakcore is my home. i wishhh it wasn't called this but my favorite like subgenre of breakcore is probs lolicore not for any fuckin weird reason but just bc the way the vocals are usually mixed scratches my brain sooooooo fuking good. listen to various types of ads by loli in early 20s and youll get it. i fucking love experimental breakcore my favorite album rossz csillag alatt született mixes breakcore+dr&b w classical and it's sooooo fucking good it's SO good i need to learn more fuckin instrument plug ins so I can make shit like that. in general i just love music that feels like it's fuckin drilling it's way into youre brain and rewiring it i want the music to fuckin labotomize me fr

39. What do you think your spirit animal would be if you had one?

- idk maybe a rat i like rats. dude imagine if i was a rat like ritz we could have cheese together. we can do that anyway but it would be more awesome

40. Have an accent of any kind?

- yea autism

41. Chess or checkers?

- checkers i have no idea how to play chess but it sounds convoluted as fuk

42. Do you feel sentimentality toward a particular object?

- i love my laptop even if I get a new computer and this thing breaks completely im keeping this laptop ily laptop

43. Are you generally pretty secretive, or are you an open book?

- im like accidentally secretive i dont even try like wtf do you mean im supposed to talk about shit

44. What are you most embarrassed about?

- i feel like this was addressed in the nene thing

45. What are your deepest fears?

- have you ever seen that fuckin brony stuff where people get teleported to pony world as horses gf is obsessed with that kinda thing but that's TERRIFYING if i woke up as a horse id fuckin die of a heart attack

46. How desperate would you have to be to lie to, steal from, injure, or murder another person? Do you do any of those things regularly?

- i like the implication that i would admit to murdering ppl on a regular basis

47. Do you have any scars? How did you get them?

- it's so fucked up i got this scar on my face and it's so bad bc I don't even scar that easy like i get into fights my entire life but i only got one scar just bc some weeb tried to kill me. like ok

48. Say someone has mistreated you in some form. Would you immediately lose your temper, hold a grudge, or simply let it go?

- you wouldnt believe my epic power to do all of those simaltaneusly

49. How do you deal with physical and mental pain?

- max volume noise nothing can hurt me if the Loud

50. What is your ideal place to live?

- never thought abt it tbh ig anywhere with my partners

51. What was your childhood like?

- just 18 years of stupid therapy programs and stupid special ed classes and ppl telling me how to think and how to act and like I was 4 years old forever i don't careeee

52. What is your favorite kind of weather?

- i think snow is pretty

53. How important to you is friendship? What about romance?

- i think they're both pretty great but idk i feel like urself should be most important bc idk shit happens and ppl leave so if you dont like yourself youre just gonna be stuck with some miserable loser who doesnt have any friends as ur only company

54. Have any disabilities, weaknesses, or allergies?

- i feel like in a hypothetical situation i would be pretty weak to godzilla

55. What’s your favorite thing to eat?

- SPICY FOOOOOOOD my spice tolerance fucks hard i will drink hot sauce. right now holdbon

56. Do you have kids? If not, do you picture yourself ever having them?

- could you fucking imagine.

57. How well can you sing?

- idk but i like it

58. Are you particularly confident? Does your confidence level change if less people are around?

- if nobody got me i know i got me

59. Do you like shopping?

- delivery apps were invented for a reason

60. How do you interact with strangers?

- tbh i usually just tune out anyone that's not talking to me LMAO

61. Have you ever been betrayed by someone you loved?

- not like perminently

62. If you could change anything about yourself, what would it be?

- don't like this question

63. If you could meet anyone from the past or future, who would it be?

- fuckkkkk my gf isn't home rn can I pick her

64. If a genie granted you three wishes, what would they be?

- money bigass house and then I wouldn't use the last one so we could just vibe forver

65. Do you like attention?

- ask pico

66. Are you glad I’ve run out of questions to ask?

- ig bc im puttin off chores ily though

[discotitsposts]

my favorite distraction

unit chief spencer reid x reader

reposting as a whole new post bc i couldn’t link the second part before

originally posted March 25th 2024 i believe

The team was currently giving the profile and the way Spencer was speaking with such authority and confidence you’d never seen before. It was so hot. He had stubble on his face and his shirt was slightly disheveled from underneath his cardigan. After he’s finished speaking the cops leave to do their job. You and Spencer go back to the office you guys had been using to try to solve the case. Spencer realizes suddenly how warm it is in the station and goes to remove his cardigan. You are in shock as he starts taking it off practically drooling at the sight. Spencer, completely oblivious hands you his cardigan and asks you if you could hang it up for him. Without thinking you reply, “Yes, sir.” He gives you a funny look and you smack your forehead when you turn around. He thinks nothing of it until it happens again. This time back at the BAU. As the new unit chief he has a lot of paper work to get done. He doesn’t mind it he likes paper work. One thing stands out to him, one of your files is incorrectly done. You’re the only one still left in the office so he brings it down to you to correct your small mistake. You look up when he walks over to you. Oh and the way he walks, it always gets to you. Especially when he’s wearing a too tight shirt, like he is now. Uh oh he’s walking towards you. He hands you a file you had finished earlier.

Hey, I was just wondering if you could take another look at this for me, I think you made a little mistake right here,” He reaches over your shoulder to point at the misinformation. You nod at what he’s saying. “If you could please fix that and then get it back to me I would appreciate that.” He smiles at you and waits for your answer. Again, only thinking of his constricted biceps in that shirt you blurt, “Yes sir!” You put your head down immediately and get to correcting what he had told you to, until you feel his big warm hand on your shoulder. You look up and he’s staring you in the eyes, he breaks the silence.

“Why do you keep doing that?”

“Doing what,” you whisper so softly he can barely hear your reply.

You keep calling me sir, I told you you don’t have to do that. It feels strange when we’ve worked together for 12 years. My desk used to be right there,” He points at Luke’s new desk. “Now it’s up there,” He raises his finger to Hotch’s old office. “Not much difference except the stairs.” You giggle without thinking. Wait maybe he didn’t intend that to be funny. NO. He breaks into a smile.

“You know, I would tell you why you keep calling me sir, but that breaks the rules of inter-team profiling.” You panic and feel sweaty at the prospect that he might know why you panic around him. “It’s you!” You blurt. His mouth opens in shock, “Me?”

YOU! I love those damn cardigans on you and your hair is so fluffy and you’re so warm!” He stares at you in shock still and you cover your mouth with your hands to stop more stupid stuff to come out. You stand up to make an escape but his hand slams on the desk in front of you to stop you. His other arm gets on your waist and he kisses you mindlessly. He stops suddenly and pulls away. You stand there with disappointment written on your face.

We can’t do that, ever again, at least not while both of us are still in the BAU.” He sighs.

“I’ll quit!” You blurt again.

He chuckles, “I can’t ask you to do that. I know you love your job.”

“I’ll transfer! Whatever you want me to do I’ll do it.”

He shakes his head. “Don’t do that. Well, it’s getting late. See you tomorrow.” He walks back to his desk and brings your now corrected file with him.

The next day

Spencer gets to his office early head still reeling after having replayed his moment with you the previous night. He feels terrible about it and wants to apologize. You’re not in yet since there’s no coffee cup on your desk like usual. Some part of him fears he may have scared you off. You two couldn’t be the same after that. He sits down and notices a paper on his desk. He skims through it.

It was your Request Of Transfer.

He picks up the phone to call you.

part two-

use of she her pronouns for reader but you could honestly replace any details some mature themes. 18+

Spencer was kissing you so passionately and aggressively you couldn't stand it. You wanted, needed more, you break away to rip your shirt off and he rips his open. Buttons flying. Then a loud sound right in your ear ringing so loudly you can barely focus on kissing him.

You open your eyes and you're in your bed, alone. Well not totally, your phone is ringing like crazy. Completely annoyed that whoever it was had interrupted your dream.

You check the caller ID. Spencer. Uh oh. What if he was angry you requested a transfer. He had told you quite firmly to not do that. Oh well how bad could him being angry be? He was really sexy when he was angry anyway.

You pick up and hear his even sexier morning voice.

"I thought I specifically said do not request a transfer."

Not angry. More nervous? Concerned maybe.

"I said I would do anything for you." You reply picking at your nail.

"No you said, 'Whatever you want me to do l'll do it,' I didn't want you to transfer."

"Well do you want me to quit instead?" You start fixing your hair in the mirror as though he could see you.

"No that's not- why are you doing this. Really. Is it me?"He still sounds nervous.

"Yes, because you said, and i quote "We can't do this while we both are in the BAU." You put your fingers up as air quotes even though no one can see you. Well except your nosey neighbor, Terry, who's always peeking at your window. You wave at her while Spencer takes a deep breath.

"Just come into work today. Alright?"

"Work? I'm unemployed right now!" You joke.

"Just come in here. Come to my office right away when you get here. I need to speak to you in person about this."

Feeling more confident you speak in a sultry voice, "Yes, sir." You hang up and go to get ready.

After you hang up Spencer is in shock at your last words.

"Yes sir" Why had those two words been so hot coming from your mouth. He feels a certain rush of blood between his legs and curses. His stomach felt all tingly.

Butterflies they call it, normally caused by stress or anxiety but this wasn't stress or anxiety. I don't feel that around her. It's the release of norepinephrine in your central nervous system but does that mean i'm in love with her? He thought. (had to google that one)

"I'm going crazy." He says out loud and rubs his face with his hands.

"You still seem to have all your marbles to me." He looks up as David Rossi walks into his office and shuts the door. He gives him a look that says, you can tell me. Spencer spills his guts to Rossi about the whole situation. Well except for the part about his enlarged crotch. When he's done Rossi sits back in his chair and is silent. He crosses his legs and fixes his cufflinks. Cartier, probably way too expensive. Spencer thinks. Rossi finally speaks. "You're not crazy kid, you're an idiot."

Spencer looks taken aback, and opens his mouth to talk when Rossi speaks again. "No I know you have an IQ of 187 and can read 20,000 words per minute so statistically you're not an idiot. I mean in love. You're an idiot in love and if you don't let her transfer you're going to regret it for the rest of your life. Not only that, she is going to do everything in her power to drive you insane until you let in. Save yourself the trouble and when you two get married you can host the wedding in my backyard." He pats Spencer on the back and stops at the door. "Oh and incidentally you're not fooling anyone having that book in your lap. Don't worry it's perfectly natural to have that reaction. Good luck." With that he shuts the door and Spencer's mouth is left open in shock. As Emily once said, IQ of 187 slashed to 60.

You get to the doors of the BAU and give yourself a little pep talk while staring at Spencer's closed office door.

You shake off the nerves and click-clack up the stairs.

You knock softly on his door but he doesn't get up and open it. He simply calls out, "Come in." You, being very mature, giggle at the word come and push the door open and step in. In a form fitting dress that makes you look very beautiful and in the most flattering color, you look like a literal goddess. Spencer almost loses his mind completely at this look on you. Was he dreaming? Maybe. Since you're walking around his office admiring his awards and PHDs, he discreetly pinches his arm and feels pain instantly. Nope not dreaming. You stop looking around and he motions you to take a seat. You look at the comfy chair in front of him. You opt for sitting on his desk instead. He stares in shock as you hop up on his desk and swing your legs. He stares at them and then at your face. He's not saying anything so you start a conversation. "Aren't you glad we're not cartoon characters?" He snaps out of it and says "Huh?"

"I said aren't you glad we're not cartoon characters.

“Otherwise we'd have to wear the same outfits all the time."

"Oh- oh yeah I guess i've never really thought about that before." He is confused why you would bring this up. This has nothing to do with why you're really there.

"Like if this was Scooby-Doo I probably wouldn't be wearing this ah-dorable dress!" You put emphasis on the adorable part. Which makes him look up, but this means his face is level with your chest which is also emphasized today. He chokes up and manages to stammer out, "Y-y-yeah," His adorable puppy eyes look at you. Trying to avoid what's in front of him.

"What's the matter Reid? Cat got your tongue?" You smirk at the fact you're making him forget everything he knows. This newfound power you have over him is insane to you. Deep down, he really is still the same man from all those years ago, before all the bad happened to him. Still just as nervous around breasts as he always had been. “Why don’t you sign my transfer request, send it in, and then come over to my place tonight for a rendezvous, hmm?”

He nods then realizes, “What, no?!”

“I'm gonna make your life hell then." You smile and walk away. He gulps. He has a feeling he knows what you're going to do.

Garcia briefs you of the new case but all Spencer can focus on is your hand creeping up his thigh. Then you pull it away and you lift your dress up right in his view. To anyone else it would seem you were adjusting the the hem but he knew you were doing it just to torture him.

Well he wasn't going give in. What were you going to do take your bra off in front of the team?

The real reason he didn't want to sign your transfer was because if he did, it would all change, which he wasn't big on. He likes the banter with you while on cases. It lightens the mood when he feels stressed. He likes you being in his sights at all times. If you transferred he wouldn't see you all day and if you were to pursue a relationship with him? He would definitely worry about you even more than he already does. Truth is, he's terrified.

On the jet you still didn't let up. Everyone knew Spencer liked his time alone on the jet to read after discussing the case so they usually let him sit alone and do his own thing. You weren't about to let him have a moment of peace. You stand next to where he's sitting. "Seat taken?

You say pointing at the one across. He looks up from his book and shakes his head. You tell him, "Actually I think I'll take this one," You point to the seat next to him and before he can protest. You're crawling over him to get to the seat next to him. Your butt bumps his book and knocks it out of his hand. He's so flustered and red it makes you chuckle into your hand.

He mutters, "Now I'm REALLY going to not sign your request off."

You blow him a kiss, "It's your funeral." He picks his book back up and you grab another from his bag and start reading it. You bring your arm up his bicep and drag it up and down, up and down. It's quite relaxing and he ends up falling asleep. Something he hadn't done well in a while.

He wakes up when the jet lands in Florida. Since it's summer it's especially hot. He half expects to see you next to him in a bikini but you're not there. and his book you had borrowed tucked neatly back into his bag.

Everyone gets to the precinct except you. He pulls Ju to the side, "Where is y/n?" He whispers. Nervous if you're up to anything.

JJ looks up, "We sent her to make the hotel arrangements." Uh oh He pulls his phone out, contemplating calling you, when the lieutenant walks in he puts his phone away and shakes his hand and introduces everyone.

When you walk back into the station wearing a normal tank top and jean shorts, Spencer thinks it looks like normal attire thank goodness. Your shirt isn't even cropped and the shorts are tight and a little short but hey it's hot out. He lets it go and figured you'd be too embarrassed to try anything. Especially with the case at hand. Which was just a con artist who had scammed people out of millions of dollars but he needed to be stopped.

Emily and JJ go to speak to some of the people who had Luke and Matt spoke to the rest. There was a lot. Rossi and Dr Lewis went out to the last known location of the Unsub to profile, while You and Reid set up an evidence board and draw a profile up. "Definitely a white male mid 30s-40s l'd say." Reid stares at the map of all the locations. Definitely you agree in your head. You only plan on distracting him for a minute. When he stands up straight, You slide past him brushing against him. His breath hitches. So that was why you had worn the shorts. Then it gets worse. Or better. He doesn't know yet. You throw a marker on the floor. "Oopsie!" You bend over to grab it and stand back up and then throw it again. "Oopsie again!" You yet again bend over to grab it and he grabs your arm and sits you down.

"I know what's you're trying to do," he starts.

You cut him off quickly, "What do you think I'm trying to do sir?" You push your arms together and pout. He lets out a quick breath and then notices JJ and Emily come back. "We have a suspect in custody!" Emily announces excitedly. JJ shakes her head and smiles.

"She found him peeking in the window while we were speaking with the James family and she chased him down the street, through a bush and kicked in a gate and slammed him down. She's pretty proud of herself." You laugh knowing how Emily loves taking unsubs down.

You guys take a break for the night to get some rest.

Spencer reaches his assigned hotel room and he opens it. Nothing unusual. One bed. You're not here, so at least he'll probably get some sleep without thinking of your hips. Shit. Just when he thinks he's safe you walk through the door holding your keycard, smirking. "You didn't think you'd be alone tonight did you?" He pushes his face into his hands and flops on the bed stomach first. "Oh no, I forgot you made the hotel arrangements." Then he starts laughing. You start to unpack your bag with everything you'd be needing for that night. Careful to not let him see a few select items.

You go get ready in the bathroom. Wearing a purple see through slip you decide to ditch the underwear and sleep with nothing under. When you get out of the bathroom Spencer is turned around bent over his go bag. "Nice butt," You say and he stands up slightly embarrassed,

"You like it huh?" Then he turns around and sees you and your lack of clothing. "Purples your favorite right?" He nods slowly taking it all in. You climb into bed. Spencer's so tired he doesn't even do a night routine and slides in next to you. The both of you fall into dreams immediately. When he wakes up he realizes his arms are hugging you close to him and you're snuggled together and you're so warm and comforting. Then he gets an idea which he will put in motion the second they get back to the BAU. He leaves the room before you wake.

When you wake up you're all alone. Wondering where he had gone you fear you may have done too much, taken it too far. Maybe you had scared him off and he had waited until you were asleep and changed rooms. What if he-

Theres a knock at the door to the room so you go to get up. As you do the bathroom door opens and Spencer comes out with just a towel around his waist. You had never seen him shirtless and you were drooling. He opens the door and thanks the man for the room service.

"Ordered you breakfast," He says rolling the tray to the bed. "Stay there." He commands and you throw your legs back into bed as he sets a tray over you and he pours creamer into your coffee the way you like. He stirs it for you and you don't think about why he might be doing it you just lay back and enjoy him making your breakfast perfect. He pours the syrup on your waffles and you think about making a joke but decide against it to not scare him off. Thank goodness he had just been in the shower when you woke up. If he really didn't want to pursue a relationship with you and let you transter what was the point in trying anymore?

Was he even attracted to you?

When you're done eating and back in the precinct you manage to prove it was this guy who had in fact conned everyone out of millions. He was now on his way to being sent to prison awaiting trial. On the jet home Spencer notices you've stopped hitting on him and acting sexy.

Now you're all covered up wearing a big sweater with sweatpants. He frowns at the thought that maybe you were upset he hadn't played along with your games. He had wanted to. You'll see when you get back to the BAU he would fix it.

You go back home Spencer having told everyone to go home and rest and take time to recuperate after working hard. You were a little bitter at this and upset he declined your offer to come over to watch a movie. You decide to just take care of yourself and reach into your drawer for your vibrator. You fall into bed and turn it on.

An hour later when you're done you put on a fluffy robe and make yourself a snack and start watching New Girl. When your phone rings. Spencer. You answer with, “What?” "I don't mean to bother you, but can you come into the BAU I know you're probably busy relaxing but-"

"I once told you l'd do anything for you." You smile to yourself, he DID want to see you.

"Ok but don't go to my office. I'm in the big conference room on the floor above the BAU." After hanging up you were about to grab your purse and go but catch a look at yourself in the mirror. No makeup, hair out of place and in a bathrobe! After quickly changing into something professional you hurry to the BAU and go one floor up to the room he had told you. You prepare yourself and then push the door open.

"Agent (Y/N)!" You see the Director, Aaron Hotchner. He shakes your hand, "It's nice to see you again. Reid was just telling me that he would like a few rules changed..." You look at Spencer who's smiling like a kid who's parents just told him he's going to Disneyland. "More specifically, Spencer requested the rules on relationships within the unit be changed. We wanted your input. I would allow you and Spencer to pursue this relationship while both of you still work in the same unit under the condition it doesn't affect the way the unit works. If I notice ANY misconduct between you two while on a case you will both be suspended and these rules reevaluated. Do you both understand me?"

"Yes I understand." You and Spencer say at the same time.

"Good. Sign here." Hotch cracks a smile and hands you a pen. You sign next to Spencer's scribbled signature.

"Good luck to you both."You hug him, "Hey are you and Jack going to JJ and Will's this Saturday? They're having a little get together!"

You ask when you pull away.

"Wouldn't miss it!" He says as he walks away and waves bye. Leaving you alone with Spencer. "Wow. You actually changed the rules to the game. I'm impressed." You cross your arms and he stands up and walks over to you and kisses you as passionately as he feels. You can't believe he did all that for you. In between the kiss you break away to tell him you love him "I love-"

"I know. I love you too."

2 months later

"Get on your fucking knees." You command. Spencer falls to the floor immediately when you walk in. He's ready to do whatever you ask. You crack your leather whip and he jumps. With every click of your stiletto boots, excitement grows within both of you.

He may be the boss at work, but at home? You were in charge.

again, reposting so it’s all one post!

(this was inspired by @mandarinmoons post here)

i ♡ sub spence i had to include it.

[onnahu]

Spirit: Stallion of the Cimarron is one of the greatest (kids) movies

It's a masterpiece. And in the first step of proving it to you, I'll shit on Disney because it's Disney. There's not even a decade between the Pocahontas movie and Spirit release. 7 years to be exact. Both movies are about colonization and Natives to some extentions, but how they're depicted is wildly different.

First off, I don't think I need to talk much about how grossly the corporation misused the story of Matoaka. I won't even talk about the second part of the movie. Honestly, their only saving grace is that the character herself is voiced by a Native.

Meanwhile in Spirit, the producers don't look at us as stupid. They don't spell it out that it's a movie about colonisation. They don't pretend there is anything even slightly positive in there. Also, because it's from a horse's perspective, the viewer don't need to have really any knowledge, which is good, as the targeted audience are children. Spirit is an outsider, just like the viewer, and isn't intrested in joining the conflict.

Actually that's another thing. How compelling Spirit is as a character. Because yes, he's a horse, but he's a part of a family. He's trying to go home, he's trying to protect his people (horses?). He was overly curious, and it hurt him (kind of what happened in Pocahontas, mind you). He has his flaws, and he's lost in that new weird world he got threw into. Like, what not to identify with?

Anyway. I'm skipping over things bc I'm just typing without any plan, but at one point Spirit is taken to the labour job. He's unhaooy (obviously), all horses around him were taken from their families and are lost and just hopeless. Do you know what happened to Native Americans when they got captured? Among others, they were put into labour. A really weird coincident, isn't it.

Also, the villain??? The Colonel is a bad man, we see it from the beginning. He's not oppose to torturing animals, not opposed to killing them nor people. He's evil. And yet, in the end, he's able to accept his defeat. It doesn't make him a good person. It doesn't make him less evil. But it shows that even evil people have their rules and morals, however twisted they are, and death isn't the only mean to end a confilct (even if now it's just a conflict between an asshole and a horse and his Native friend). He could shoot at least one of them. But he didn't out of respect. No less evil, but it gives some hope for change. That's what we need in movies for kids. I mean, sometimes it's important to show irredeemable people, but it also takes away from reality. Things are not black and white, and SSotC really shows it. (Unlike most Disney villains, that especially nowadays either doesn't exist are bland or are just evil to their core without any nuance.)

Also it feels like i'm being disney hater. And I kinda am, but mostly for reasons i'm a hater of all multimillion companies. Dreamworks isn't out of it either. But currently I'm focusing on their movies, and Disney was less of a shit back before 2000 anyway.

Yeah I also kinda forgot the whole thing I had going on with how Natives are depicted. Is it perfect? No. Is it one of the best representation at the time and especially in the big companies? Yes. The people are not shown as either stupid nor naive. They're also not bloodthirsty or some shit. They are what Spirit is - they're just trying to live their lives and protect what theirs. The horrible reality of how colonisators treated them isn't censured that it's erased, but enought to be adequate for children that will watch the movie. It makes us curious about the culture, history, and that's exactly what we need for minorities.

Also the music? THE FUCKING MUSIC IN THIS MOVIE WILL TEAR MY HEART OUT!!!

[imsofuckinggayforwomen]

Hello :) please could I request a fic of giyu tomioka x hashira reader where they share their first kiss together accidentally and he walks away in shock from it and she thinks she’s done something wrong. He later approaches her and tells her he thinks it’s better that they stay friends, even though he secretly loves her and wants to protect her 💙💙

this is such a good idea but I’m making a happy ending bc I hate angst

Also just so y’all know I’m prolly not gonna write a whole fic unless it’s an event or something cuz I’m always busy but I’ll make sure yall get ur cute drabbles dw

Warnings: nothing just fluff cuz giyuu deserves fluff

How could I love on you? | Tomioka Giyuu

You’ve always been right by his side, proving to him that you truly cared. When he felt he had no one, you always appeared out of the dark. It’s like you really enjoyed being around him. He found it hard to believe that anyone could deal with his presence. But you, you liked being around him?

You certainly proved your feelings for him, catching him off guard by the touch of your lips. The two of you had only been stargazing when you brought your face closer to his.

He felt a fire light inside of him, warming his body and widening his eyes. It felt like eternity he had waited for this exact moment, the soft skin of your lips gracing his own. Almost a second after the initial contact, you had pulled away. He must have seemed shocked, or disgusted or something. You quickly began to scramble away, seeming ashamed by the act you just committed.

Tomioka was quick to basically tackle you to the ground, encasing you in the warmth of his arms. You both collapsed with a thud, his hold effectively shielding you.

“Why are you leaving?” He whispered, gripping you tighter.

Tears threatened to fall from your eyes. “I’m sorry” you muttered into the ground, fist balled up in the grass. Giyuu raised a brow, slowly lifting himself off of you.

You stayed face down in the ground, rethinking every decision up to this point. How could you have been so careless? So stupid? So driven by emotion? You felt stupid, you looked stupid, and you thought stupid. Your inner insults ran laps around your mind. That was until a strong pair of arms lifted you from your dirt sniffing position, placing you into a familiar lap.

Tomioka laid your head to rest on him, combing his fingers through your hair. His eyes seemed, awake. Not far off and distant like usual.

“Why apologize?” He asked, pupils staring into yours.

“I should’ve-“ You stammered, trying to avoid eye contact. “I should’ve asked.”

He shrugged, still running his fingers through your hair. “Yes, a heads up would’ve been preferred” he replied.

“But I did not dislike it..” he added, watching your eyes widen. “However, due to the current state of my work, I highly doubt we can pursue this right now.”

It was true, Giyu had a job to do. It wasn’t easy being a hashira, it would be even harder to balance work life and love life. Each mission he would disappear for days or weeks on end, never knowing if he would return alive. Your eyes soften a bit, content with his feelings but struggling with the reality.

“I promise” he suddenly spoke, his calm demeanor never faltering. “After this all ends, I will properly love you. Until that happens, I will protect you with my life.”

His words melted into your senses like butter, tingles prickling up your spine and stopping at your racing heart. You fought back the tears again, happy and sad tears. One day, he will come home to you. He seems sure of it, so you believe him. There’s nothing else to do but believe after all.

This was short and sweet, dawg needed a good-ish ending fr.

[genericpuff]

in reference to the have you read LO poll by god have I tried but god. God...

A vicious cycle. I go okay I really do need to plow through more of it if I'm gonna hang around the ULO reddit, and then I step on the comically placed rake. I can't do a complete skip thing bc I'll be too disorientated on where I'm at in the plot but my brain only tolerates it up until she declares she's missing her dick appointment and like, girl. Please. You committed mass murder (if not genocide) and this is a slap on the wrist considering, let alone that your moms got the worse end of the deal.

Why it's that specific moment idk but the bottom just drops out for me and it's soooo fucking stupid because like, she couldn't have just... bitched about being stuck with hard labor? That's the bitchy shit I'd sort of expect from a privileged nepo baby and even barring the twue wuv story going on it's her actual biggest issue going on right then. What she's presently living out. But yeah no, horny, we gotta establish that she's horny. Okay.

Sorry about the borderline vent over it there's just enough really interesting thoughts mixed up in the pile of flaming garbage to make one go rabid if they stew on it, and you clearly get that given the rewrite. Have a good day.

omg i've had that exact sort of thing happen with me before too tho, not in quite the exact same sense of like, "wanting to take part in a community but struggling to get through the source material it's based on", but there are like, so many webtoons and manga and stories I've tried to read - after being urged to by pals and people who read them - that I've dropped after multiple attempts of trying to read them. And they're not necessarily dumpster fires like LO (though some of them definitely aren't great) it's more like I'm sitting there wondering "when's this gonna get good? when's this gonna be worth all the hype?" Tower of God is the biggest one that comes to mind, I have tried to read that webtoon on SEVERAL occasions and I just can't justify trudging through all those early episodes for it to maybe "get good". And that's not even me saying it's bad, it's just not interesting to me in the slightest. No hate to anyone who likes ToG, I think I've also sorta drifted away from shonen over the years so that's definitely not helping, but I just can't be bothered to try and read that webtoon anymore, I've given it so many attempts and I'm doing lmao Kudos to the creator though because it's a LOT of work to make a webtoon of that length and they should be proud of that.

Back on the topic of LO though, yeah, I was following the comic when that episode was still brand new and it really made us all go 🤨 because of how out-of-pocket it was. And then like an episode (or two?) later she bullied a former classmate of hers from 10 years ago at his job. That was the precedent for Persephone's character that was set for the third season of LO and it's just gotten worse as it's gone on.

Either way, if I'm being honest, you're really not missing much by skipping over the majority of S3 (like, if you made it to the dick appointment episode before giving up then you're already pretty close to the current point in the story). Like I'm not gonna lie, you could easily skip up to the midseason cutoff point because everything leading up to that is just a bunch of nothing. Hades and Persephone get married and it's the most underwhelming scene ever despite it being the moment people had been waiting years for, also they 'adopt' Dionysus but he's barely in the comic except for when Rachel remembers he's a character so you could also get by on minimal details. Oh yeah, and it turns out Demeter had a kid during the 10 year time skip who we see in like two episodes and then proceeds to get fridged forever.

So yeah, as much as I'd recommend people read LO as a sort of "entry ticket" into the crit community surrounding it, S3 is a lot of nothing and you would frankly not miss out on a thing if you skimmed it or skipped the middle portion of it entirely lmao

[monkeytrick]

ausjswoidwi0xei2w93294232

Ok like. Executive dysfunction. And trauma response. Are both phrases that might earn an eye roll from you and I get it. But I feel like one is the other for me and they’re both just causing a horrible loop that is making my life worse constsntly man. It really hit me today that like. Oh my god I am traumatized. I regularly will have flashbacks and either go totally limp and try to ignore everything happening and play dead or I’ll freak the fuck out and start screaming and sobbing and shit and I feel like this entire past month I’ve just been constantly going back and forth between both without any time dedicated t being a normal person which makes me feel so awful and insane because I’ve had like actual fun shit to do this month but I’ve been breaking down so fucking bad bc I literally don’t think I have the capability to live like a normal adult person is supposed to and I don’t have a choice at all because I don’t think I can ever be in contact with my family again. My dad is a domestic abuser and a methhead and an attempted rapist and I’m so scared he’s done more than attempt it since I last saw him. MULTIPLE times he just showed up st my workplace which is across the country from where he actually fucking lives without warning and when he went to jail it was in this state and not his home one. I still don’t know what the fuck he did because I only heard about it from my brother and I can’t fucking talk to anyone else in my family because I’m afraid of them all! My mom is actively without exaggeration trying to ruin my fucking life as revenge against me not talking to her because she was already doing this shit before I cut contact and will steal my money and try and track me down and threaten suicide over my continued existence. I don’t have anyone I can go to in real life about any of this shit and even the people who understand can’t help me at all. I’ve been trying to move in with my friend and after recovering from the extended mental breakdown I’ve been having all month I’m realizing I literally like. Do not have the shit I need to do that. And I don’t know if I ever will because of my family situation. I don’t know how to break it to them and I don’t know what the fuck to do because I don’t think I have an option that isn’t fucking them over extremely badly and it’s entirely my own fucking fault man bc I’ve just been trying to ignore my life so bad. I feel so bad about my current living situation bc my friend and their family were kind enough to let me stay and were really understanding initially but they all just really fucking want me gone by now which is like. Understandable. And the reasonable way to respond. But I’m so scared because I need to be out of here by the end of june and I think my best option is subletting on my own but I feel more certain and terrified every day that I’m just going to be homeless and fired from the job I currently have before I’m 21. I don’t even want to be someone that wants to kms anymore but I feel like god is like literally actually punishing me for existing and I can’t bring myself to deal with living at all. I’m not going to kill myself now and I have stupid reasons to continue being alive but they are reasons but I feel like the only way to stay set on that path and not change my mind and go insane and fucking die is if I get in a psych ward right the fuck now and trying to review my options there is making me even more miserable bc I don’t think I’m even on health insurance anymore and I don’t think I’d be able to get on it in time to not go insane and be a danger to myself. No matter what I am going to be in horrific debt. I just don’t know what to fucking do man. I haven’t looked at any of my texts in like 3 days because I am so fucking scared. I no wanna be around anymore. I cannot bring myself to do fucking snything

[here4kpopfics]

hi bubba!!! congrats on your huge milestone aaaah well fucking deserved omg 😩😩😩

i have a lil request for you hehehehe: how about brothers best friend au + member of your choice and this lovely prompt: "If you tell anyone about this, I will kill you."

i’m sure you can come up with something!! hehe good luck my love 💘💘💘

my beautiful Lati, I can only apologize for this. 💀 Thank you for always being so amazing and supportive, especially when I started writing again, I love you bby. 😘

also shoutout to @daimyosjeon for betaing this nonsense bc I just keyboard smashed my way through it. sorry for not warning you about the filth 🙈

Masterlist | AskBox | Coffee?

hobi x reader | smut, fluff if you squint? | a nice little 1,235 words | 18+ | Jimin's a menace, wrap before tap

You’ve made a lot of bad decisions growing up. Like, a lot. From bad friend groups to shit relationships, picking a useless degree over one you actually wanted to moving halfway across the country for a job you never wanted in the first place. 

The worst decision you’ve ever made is the one you’re currently making. 

“Fuck, hurry up, Hobi. He’ll be back soon.” Your voice rasps, feeling sore after just having your brother’s best friend’s cock recklessly rammed down your throat. 

“Relax, y/n. He’ll be out for another few hours. Let me take my time with you.” His lips resume their work against your skin, nipping and licking at random spots that can be covered by clothes, lightly kissing on spots that can’t. Like your neck, which is driving you insane. 

You don’t remember when you started fucking your brother’s friend. If it was after a party, or just when he came over one day to hang out with both of you at your apartment and things just spun out of control from there. 

All you know is this is a horrible decision, and his hips and dick are like fucking magic. But goddamn do you love the way he has you pinned against the wall in your hallway, hands gripping your thighs as your legs wrap around his waist and both of you are half naked. 

“I don’t want you to take your time, ” your fingers tug at his hair that he’s been growing out for reasons he won’t say, and force him to look at you. “I want you to fuck me until I forget who you are.” 

“I can do both.” He gives you that stupid grin that you’re afraid to say you adore. You push the thought out of your mind, and bring his lips to yours in a searing kiss. You barely feel one of his hands leave your thigh to shove his underwear down and reach between you two to line himself up with your entrance and push inside without hesitation. 

You pull away from his lips, dropping your head against the wall at the perfect stretch, “fuck, your cock feels so fucking good.”

His chuckle vibrates against your skin as he pulls his hips away slightly, just to grab the back of your knees and open your legs further. A part of you feels like you should be terrified of him dropping you, but you know he’d never.

“God, baby. Look at how well you take it.” He grunts, his gaze stuck on the way his cock pumps in and out of you. “So fucking wet, just slides right in.” He looks up to see you watching as well, your brows furrowed and your pussy clenching every time he thrusts into you. 

“How long were you ready for me today, hmm? Was it when I came over or since last night’s phone call?” You whine, trying to forget the night before where he had you on facetime and made you finger yourself until you were squirting. You almost blacked out after, hanging up immediately when you heard your brother come home. 

“Shut up.” You bring his lips back to yours, but you can feel the grin forming, teeth hitting yours as he brings you to your bed. 

“Good lord, every time it just gets better.” Hoseok laughs as he collapses next to you on your bed. You smirk, still trying to regain the ability to do anything. You’re going to be grossly sore tomorrow. 

“What are you doing?” You question when he cuddles one of your pillows under his head. “Absolutely not. Get up and get your clothes off the floor.” 

“Aish, where’s the romance these days?” He grumbles. Sitting back up, you throw the pillow at his back and laugh. 

“We fuck, Hobi. And we tell no one. That’s it.” 

He says nothing, walking out of your room and gathering not only his clothes off the floor, but yours as well.

“I, for once, think your brother would be cool with us.” The teasing tone he gives makes you scowl. You lean against your headboard, watching him put your clothes in your hamper and his on the bed. 

“We both know Yoongi would not only kill you, but me as well, if he finds out his best friend was fucking his little sister.” 

He mumbles in agreement, walking into your bathroom to shower. You lay back down, your bed sheet covering your naked body.

You get all of three minutes to yourself before your bedroom door is flung open. 

“You will not believe who I ran into toda-ahh! Sorry! Sorry! Holy fuck, I’m sorry!” Your best friend throws his hands up to cover his eyes, turning his back to you. 

“Jimin! What the fuck? Do you not understand knocking?!?!” You clutch the bed sheet to your chest, sitting up in anger. 

“I’m sorry! I didn’t know you were gonna be post-bang!” He turns back around when he thinks it’s safe, glancing over to the pile of clothes and the bathroom where the sound of the shower turns off. “Who, uh, who is it by the way? Is it that one hunk from statistics? Because hell yes, I’d be lying in bed post-bang like that too.”

“Shut up, Jimin. Please leave.” 

“Boo, you suck.”

“Just go awa—

“Who are you talking to?” Hoseok opens the bathroom door, clad only in a towel loosely hanging around his hips. If Jimin wasn’t here, there'd be a round two within seconds. 

You look back at your best friend, whose mouth is wide open in shock, a giant grin quickly taking over it.

“You are not banging Yoongi’s best friend! Does he know? Oh my god, when he finds out he’s going to kill you both.” 

You quickly jump out of bed, keeping the blanket wrapped around you as you charge towards Jimin, pressing him against the wall. 

“You’ll be dead too, Jimin. Because I swear to fucking god, if you tell anyone about this, I will kill you myself.” You glare daggers at him, and he nods quickly.

“Understood. There’s nothing going on between you two.” You nod, turning back to grab some new clothes. 

“She’s so threatening, isn’t she? It’s really kind of a turn on.” Hoseok laughs, bending down quickly to avoid the object you chuck across the room.

“Hoseok. Get dressed and leave before Yoongi gets back. Jimin, wait in the living room, I'm gonna shower really quick.” Jimin nods, backing out of your room with a smug grin. 

“I’ll leave while you’re in the shower.” He speaks a little softer, approaching you from behind. “But I’ll see you again soon, right?” His whispers meet your ear, soft lips kissing the space just behind them as his hands find your hips and bring them flush against his. 

“Yeah…but we have to be more careful. Yeah, that was just Jimin. But what if next time we’re not lucky and it’s Yoongi?” Your head leans back against his chest as he buries his face in your neck. 

“We’ll be smarter, baby. I promise. I’ll text you, okay?” 

“Okay.” He lets go of you, letting you walk into the bathroom, shutting the door behind you. He quickly gets dressed, leaves you a little note on your pillow and leaves after saying bye to Jimin on the couch.

You take extra long in the shower to purposefully avoid Jimin’s questions. 

heh....heh....sorry? you're welcome? idk i love you 💜

[itsjaywalkers]

i just wanted to say that oby jeggy are in my every waking thoughts i love them and i'm very excited to read the rest <3 (no pressure tho!!) so in the meantime i must ask : how are they doing ?🥰

hope you have a wonderful day <33

YOU'RE SO VERY REAL FOR THAT NONNIE they're always on my mind too.. my horny babies.. they're so in love with each other <3 even if one of them is currently very much in denial

i'm excited to share part 3 of oby with all of u too!! i haven't touched in days unfortunately, bc nothing happens has me by the throat BUT i promise i'll go back to it soon!! and i'll do my best to finish it asap!!

they're doing well!! depends on when in the storyline we're talking about but even before they get together they are . doing great tbh . acting like a couple even tho the whole thing is supposed to be casual lmao

i feel like reg has the day off (simply bc i have the day off and as we all know i project onto reg's work struggles very heavily bc i need some kinda outlet to complain about my stupid job) and woke up briefly when james got up to go to work, tried to convince him to stay and fuck him but gave up quickly bc he was still half asleep and very tired. he still kissed james goodbye tho!! then he properly woke up a few hours later, made breakfast and lazed around before he finally found the strength to clean up a little + do laundry + tidy up their room and then invited barty and the twins for lunch <3 they're still there when james gets home and they all spent the evening together until reg and james begin to get handsy and reg's friends take their leave!! not without barty pushing for a threesome just to mess with james . as per usual . it's very much a recurring thing (which only ends in james kicking him out)

i also hope you have a wonderful day babe MWAH <333

[popcultr]

RESPOND TO THE FOLLOWING PROMPTS OOC , THEN TAG OTHERS YOU WANT TO GET TO KNOW BETTER.

tagged by: @everseens (thank you lovely!!) tagging: @angelsdvsts / @testdrves / @luriddaze / @saudadexmses (and anyone else who wants to do this!)

roleplayer name: corrie (yes, that's my real name, not a nickname)

roleplayer pronouns: she/her

preferred communication: drop me an im on here! or a message on discord, if you have it.

experience: oh wowieeee, i think like most people on this site, i started rping around 2013(ish), i'd been in the "anon world" beforehand idk if anyone remembers that. then i randomly stumbled into the rp world and that was it, i was sold, i started in groups and rping irl celebs bc that was what was in fashion at the time (gross, i know). i've written in both groups and indie rp for some years, but rn i'm only doing indie, as i find it so much easier, a lot less pressure!!!!

preferred roleplay type: i'm a big fan of paras!! i don't mind, long or short!! i just like hearing about how both our characters are thinking / feeling etc, world building, give it to me!!

pet peeves & dealbreakers: omg, i've got a few bc i've been in the rp world for a long time!! first off, people who still treat tumblr rp like it's their job, bestie, it's okay, take some time off, we are all nearly 30 here, this is a hobby for all of us. secondly, people that bug you about replies, unless i have messaged u and said "hey i've lost ur post or something along those lines" 99% of the time its in my drafts & i'm going to reply to it. thirdly, idk, this is group rp related but i hate activity checks, one of the main reasons i moved over to indie properly bc i found myself getting so stressed about not being able to get online & that i might be on the activity check?? so stupid. lastly, when people don't give me much back in a reply & it's like drawing blood out of stone trying to reply, one time, someone said they didn't want to reply 2 my reply, bc i'd "written too much background" or something, like wtf asdfghj...like i had to explain why my character would be at this random location </3

plots or memes: both are fun!! but i think i do prefer plotting & discussing things with my writing partners. also u can headcanon when u plot, i love it xx

best time to write: oooh, for me, personally i like to write in the evenings!! as it's something that i like to do relax & chill out, so it makes sense. idk if this makes sense, i do prefer to write on the weekends, bc i have a bit more time to put into my replies <3

are you like your muse?: no, i'm definitely not like my current muses!! i did write a dyspraxic muse in the past (i have dyspraxia), but that didn't work out bc people didn't really get it lol.

[vacantgodling]

i know you said u were gonna write them regardless, but if it has any bearing on priority, i particularly want to see 2 and/or 7 (same general vibe imo) of the pining prompts <3 -from @calicojackofficial

rip it took me FOREVER to get to this HOWEVER thank you for asking i really appreciate it :’)

(if you wanna request a pining prompt that will take a dubious amount of time to get to the list is here!)

i’m gonna do this for jihan & hue bc 💛 them

2. Quickly sewing back the loose button of their shirt that came off at the last minute, realising that you two are extremely close & 7. Fixing each other's clothes (+ if they say "you look good")

At some point, the irresponsibility that came with early twenties had begun to fall away to make room for responsibility that came with the latter half of this decade. Hue had his fun; frat parties, and stupid college shit, bad decisions that he wouldn’t regret only for the sake of reveling in chasing his youth like a dog chases it’s tail… pause for the metaphor, or perhaps, lack thereof. But he was graduated now and he couldn’t live at his sister’s forever. Not that she would mind particularly, it’s just that he would. He wanted to have a place to call his own, more than just a 3x4” room of space—and to not have to sneak every person he brought home out of the window should he want to bring them over.

No, he needed a job.

There wasn’t even that much of a rotating line of guests in his bed anyway, at least, not anymore. Ever since last year, he’d only had eyes for one man, who was currently sprawled on the bed in the tiny room his sister let him have, and the only one of his… interests that she’d ever willingly let come in through the front door. Jihan was idly flipping through a wayward magazine and Hue’s tail twitched in agitation as he fiddled with the buttons of his dress shirt. His interview was for a small pharmaceutical lab that specialized in supernatural medicines; close enough to what he was studying back in school and consequently, the first place to give him a callback after he applied.

He fumbled with the buttons for perhaps the third time, and his frustrated groan made Jihan look up.

“Need help?” He asked sweetly and Hue huffed, but didn’t argue, so with a little laugh Jihan stood from the bed and stepped into his space. The one reason he’d been avoiding asking for help is well—

A helpless shudder ran down Hue’s spine when Jihan’s hands brushed against his bare skin to undo the buttons of his shirt. He’d been more and more on edge lately. He and Jihan had kept it PG for longer than he was expecting if he was honest, and it was at the point now that even the lightest touch and smelling Jihan’s barely there pheromones was almost enough to get him going. Almost. He had self control. For the most part.

He managed to hold still while Jihan redid his buttons, but Jihan swore softly when one of the buttons that had been giving him the most trouble popped off altogether.

“Seriously.” Hue couldn’t help but growl, but Jihan’s chuckle smoothed over the agitation that spiked within his chest.

“Now now, don’t growl at it, you’ll scare it away.” Jihan got down on the floor to begin to search for the missing button and Hue started to bend himself but Jihan tutted at him. “You know how long it took me to iron that for you? Stand up straight.” Hue sighed, but conceded, watching the vampire card through the shag carpeting for a full minute until he finally produced the button. He stood back up, then went over to his bag and rifled through it for a moment.

“What’re you doing?”

“Getting a sewing kit.” Jihan said over his shoulder. “Since I know this is the only good shirt you have.” Hue would’ve snarked back but, “You carry around a sewing kit?”

“One for wounds and the other for clothes.” Jihan returned back to him, threading the needle with practiced ease. “Old habits, and all that.” He did pause to drink in the low cut of Hue’s unbuttoned shirt, and though Jihan told him before that he had—well, whatever it was called when he couldn’t recognize faces, did he know that his own face could look so hungry? Hue’s mouth ran dry. Jihan came back to reality after a second, smiling toothily at him. “Though I don’t think this is a bad look on you.”

“I’m interviewing for a lab not a strip club.” Hue’s murmur was far too fond to sound truly cross. Jihan chuckled but it sounded deeper in his chest, and the subtle scent of him grew stronger.

It used to be a blessing to be able to tell when people started to get aroused around him. Hue had loved it when he was young and flirting in bars, but Jihan was different territory. They’d been practically inseparable the past few months, and they hadn’t even so much as held hands yet, let alone declare that they were anything beyond good friends. But they both knew they were toeing the line, and worse yet, so did everyone around them. The number of looks his sister gave him when Jihan was hanging out around the house and his pheromones subtly shifted made his dark cheeks flush in ways he was glad Jihan himself couldn’t see.

Jihan’s nimble fingers sewed the button back on as though it were just an afterthought, and he stuck the needle back into its little kit and into his own pocket, before he buttoned the shirt back up again. He smoothed a few wrinkles in the shirt, plucked a stray hair from where Hue had braided his mane back as neatly as he could. Then he smiled.

Hue didn’t know if his chest or his pants were tighter.

“You look good.” Jihan murmured fondly. He let one hand trail against his as-of-this-morning clean shaven jaw. “Though I do miss this.”

“I’ll grow it back when I get the job.” Hue said back, softly, not that they needed to whisper. “Not like it takes long for it to grow back anyway.” Jihan laughed at that. “That’s true! I almost envy it.”

“Have you ever had facial hair, Han?” Jihan screwed his face up and Hue had a hard time picturing it. “Mm… Not that I can remember but it probably looked like shit if I had.”

“Maybe one of your old friends has a picture.” Hue teased and Jihan shoved him, finally stepping far enough away that Hue didn’t feel as lightheaded. But, the warm feeling in his chest was still there; still buzzing like alcohol under his skin.

“Hey, Han?”

“Mm?” Jihan had taken residence back up on his bed and was just reaching for the magazine but paused at his name. “… If I get the job, would you…” Hue swallowed hard—his tongue suddenly felt too big for his mouth. “Would you um, go on a date? With me?” Hue asked. Jihan blinked at him and Hue quickly waved his hand. “I mean, not as friends but as—“

“I know what you meant.” A slow smile slid onto Jihan’s face. “But I’d go on a date with you even if you don’t get the job. Hell,” His grin was blinding. “We could go on a date right now, if you want.” Hue flushed and Jihan chuckled. “I can tell you’re blushing.”

“How?!”

“I can smell the blood rushing to your cheeks.” Jihan snickered and somehow that made it worse; every time he’d gotten flustered around him, he’d known—hadn’t he? Well… it was no different than him being able to tell when Jihan was hard, anyway.

“Well, then how about this,” Hue walked back to his bed and knelt, pressing his nose against Jihan’s.

“If I get this job, I’ll pay for the date.”

“And if you don’t?” Jihan’s voice was too teasing to be serious.

“Then our date is at a bar and you’re buying me shots.”

Jihan laughed and pushed Hue back; probably not wanting to breach their mounting tension right before he had something important to do, and Hue thanked him even if he wished he hadn’t.

But he had a good feeling when he went out to his car. He waved back to Jihan and his sister as he headed off towards the interview.

He smiled.

A really good feeling.

[spector]

my goomens s2 thoughts

ok so spoilers obviously BUT

my god . this was a shitshow GFFHIGHFIg i really went in with like . the lowest expectations bc all i wanted was a). see my purple whore (gabriel) and see him be funny b). have a good finale for him where he remains the most special boy in heaven

i did NOT expect the show to be sooo bad in the writing department it was insane. like, ok, i don't care much for crowley and aziraphale, i never did. i love it when they're being fruity and silly on screen, that's fun but overall I'm not very much invested in them. but in this season u barely get them doing fun stuff together, they're always split up and on their own they just don't deliver

AND THE WORST FUCKING PART. are those fucking minisodes/flashbacks . they're so bad. my god. but its clear everyone involved in creating them LOVES the idea but ???? every single one of them SUCKED and took focus away from interesting things that were happening in the PRESENT. the entire mystery plot about gabriel was interesting but guess what, they set it up and then . forget about it until the last episode where they just do a MASSIVE exposition dump in like 15 minutes. u get the entire mystery handed to you on a silver platter and the worst part is, they could have set it up like a genuine investigation for the viewer to guess it, but its the same as BBC sherlock fuckery. the actual resolution is something u never could have guessed on your own !!!!!!!! like there were hints (wit the fly in the shop) but they NEVER followed up on it, they just randomly resolve it in the final episode . my god

anyways back to the minisodes/flashbacks. theyre so bad. i said that already but they're so bad. the blitz episode is the worst offender bc not only it takes place right after that really nice scene from s1 and thusly robs it of any emotional impact, but its also . JUST BAD. EXTREMELY BORING AND UNFUNNY. DREADFULLY UNFUNNY. job minisode was really bad too . the finale of it was ok but the whole buildup was stupid as FUCK. the corpse robbing bit in victorian edinburgh was SOOOO boring and at the end there - extremely cringe. WHY DID THEY EVEN BOTHER WITH THOSE. THEY ADDED NOTHING TO THE PLOT. at least in s1 when they did the minisodes, they served as character exploration for crowley and aziraphale and they also set up some of heaven/hell lore, THE ONES IN S2 WERE NOTHING. NOTHING AT ALL . at one point it seemed like all the bits from the past somehow lead to the current mystery (like that doctor guy and the pub named after him) BUT THEN IT ALL TURNED OUT TO NOT BE CONNECTED AT ALL

the blitz episode . my god . it was just . so bad. i have no words really.

and the lesbian subplot - like. it needed to be more connected to the main plot. i didn't mind it at all but . it went and disappeared and then suddenly became the focus of episode five... WHEN AT THIS POINT, WE SHOULDVE BEEN GETTING CLOSER TO SOLVING THE MYSTERY. BUT THE MYSTERY WAS SHELVED FOR SOME FUCKING REASON. its insane how much aziraphale and crowley just. forget about gabriel even tho they should be busting ass to solve the case as it were.

and my god, gabriel. ive never been like. ride or die for gabriel/beelzebub, they've always been two boss bitches that slayed together or whatever , i prefer them to be that and not romantically involved but i also dont mind them to be an item. so whatever, i dont mind them being endgame BUT I MIND BOTH OF THEM DITCHING THEIR POSITIONS OF POWER BECAUSE I THINK THEYRE TOO COOL FOR THAT . WHATEVER . THATS LAME . they should've like. reorganized everything .

AND ALSO THE WAY THEY KEPT SHELVING GABRIEL AND JUST LIKE. LEAVING HIM OUT OF EPISODES????? WHAT??? THE WHOLE CATALYST FOR EVERYTHING AND THEY FORGET ABOUT HIM FOR LONG STRETCHES OF TIME. INSANE??? AND RESOLVE EVERYTHING SOOO QUICKLY IN THE FINAL EPISODE??? what the hell

ITS JSUT ? INSANE HOW BAD THE WRITING IS and i don't even mean that from a gabriel girlie's perspective. imagine if the season starts out with like, idk a murder mystery and it looks like solving the murder is the most important thing for the story, at least it seems so in episode one. and then suddenly the rest of the season is about what the two detectives did some time ago and its totally unrelated and also at some point there are two episodes dedicated to them looking for some files for an unrelated mystery to get their bosses of their back. and the murder is solved at the last moment through magical CCTV footage they could've accessed at any point in the season if they just Tried A Bit Harder.

it really boggles the mind. it REALLY DOES. they should have dropped all the minisodes they did NOTHING . the ball episode should have been like. ep 3 or smth. the rest should've been the investigation of the weird fuckery. shax was wasted. additional hell and heaven lore felt like deconstruction instead of worldbuilding. I'm going insane with how bad all of this was, I REALLY DIDNT EXPECT IT TO BE SUCH A SHITSHOW LIKE DFHGIDDHGIGH ITS FUNNY??? ITS JUST BASICS OF SHOWMAKING .

I SAID TO SUSAN THAT THIS FEELS LIKE A SHOW WRITTEN DURING THE WRITERS STRIKE BUT IT WASNT . IT WAS WRITTEN BEFORE OUGHHHH

and again, i dont care about aziraphale but the last moment arc felt so out of character for him like my god, didn't we just spend an entire job minisode establishing he's questioning heaven and now he just returns to it AUHGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG what the fuck is going on. how is this so BAD HGIFGHGIH . the last episode is such a shitshow that its like. its remarkable. I'm genuinely surprised bc my expectations were low but WOW. just WOW

i have to stop now before i continue picking everything apart but AUGHGHG JESUS !!!!! I COULDNT HAVE PREDICTED IT BEING SO BAD